Fare thee well…Wilt thou teach her to say “Father!”

That’s probably enough Byron for anyone. But I wanted this post to start with a poetic feel to it - because Kiwiblog has potentially lost one of its most unique posters, D4J.

As Kent pointed out in a thread (props for spotting this), it looks like D4J is close to quitting the Blog presumably because he’s not feeling particularly loved at the moment. I am not sure how I feel about this.

Once you stop fearing for his or your safety (or both), some people can actually come to appreciate D4J’s bizarre and disturbing posting as if it were some sort of challenging art work. On the other hand, it may be too easy to dismiss his offensive excretions as being the work of a barely educated maniac. But even if he is disturbed and on the wrong side of the cusp of literacy, I am not sure you can or should excuse the blatant hate he pours out.

But no matter how you feel about him, you have to admit the Blog will be slightly different without him. Well, I say that, but ‘john’ hasn’t yet declared whether he will or will not continue to post.

For DPF, D4J’s departure is a mixed blessing. On one hand, DPF benefits by losing a person who, by association, is bleeding off National’s credibility. But, on the other hand, DPF is also losing one of his strongest draw cards. Whenever D4J opens his ‘Cloaca Maxima’ the crap he pours out has benefitted DPF by luring the indignant and the bemused onto the Blog as they feel compelled to respond.

I dunno, I can’t see D4J staying away. Outside of the Blog, he’s just a pretty miserable and pathetic dude. D4J’s blog is pretty desperate and sad and his efforts on other blogs are not appreciated - mainly because on these blogs, he is out there alone provoking nobody. On Kiwiblog, D4J has some sort of cult status (for all the wrong reasons).

I for one will be watching developments.

It must be Friday

Davey’s clearly looking to pump his Friday audience by dropping a couple of salvos on the Masterton child abuse case and the conviction of Phillida Bunkle. Both posts are designed to lure in the rabid jerks.  It’s a clear wind up.  No doubt the likes of D4J will gum out their usual hateful bile.  Well-meaning lefties will take the bait and argue with a loonies and the upshot will be that DPF will have once again sucked in a decent Friday readership. I am sure he doesn’t give a rats about the section 59 change or Phillida Bunkle’s fall from grace - but he’s guessing they’re good bait to suck in readers so that they may also gaze upon the other bits of propaganda he’s going to throw up today.

Talking of hateful bile and to show I am not exagerating, this is one of D4J’s posts this morning (in the General Debate section) -

The justice system is appallingly dysfunctional . It’s pretty bad when crown prosecution refuse to act on evidence which was imperative to a fair trial of a father I’ve been assisting. The morning of the trial ( Monday last ) in Timaru after the jury was sworn the judge had no option but to declare a mistrial . I said to the hateful Ashburton demon [ZOS DELETION] dyke - get a new job lady as you are a hated and bent pig . She went red in the face and the judge went that will be enough Mr B . I walked out laughing at the stunned fools . Nothing in the paper about the huge bulls up from the crown . You know what the dyke demon said in a catty voice ; ” I don’t care . ” About sums up the attitude of the cops in kiwiland . Rotten bastards are dangerous dumb wits !!

I see some lefties have already taken the bait.

The John/D4J double act

I see the lovely Robyn is over at Kiwiblog playing with a John/D4J double act.  Of course, D4J is in full faux rage about being mixed up with ‘John’.  Curiously, ‘John’ doesn’t appear to mind the conflation.  If you were a cynic, you might think ‘John’ was D4J’s alter ego - although more ‘altered id’ than ‘alter ego’.  I’ll go on record and say I don’t believe John is D4J.  Now whether they’re both Peter Burns, well….

1000 registered users

According to DPF, Kiwiblog registered its 1000th user today. That’s nice for Kiwiblog and very nice for National.

We don’t begrudge Kiwiblog its traffic. And, in some respects, it’s good there’s somewhere in the New Zealand environment that caters for political dialogue. But I am not sure all 1000 registered users are entirely clear about DPF’s current relationship with the National Party.

Like many in the mainstream media, DPF’s abvuncular manner disarms many into believing he’s just this down-to-earth guy who throws up posts as they occur to him without any reference to the strategic interests of the National Party. But if you’re aware of the bias, you notice it straight away. It’s not just what he says - but what he fails to say that’s significant.

Davey’s also proud of the huge number of comments he receives. Legitimately - he’s miles ahead of any rival New Zealand blogs. But you have to challenge the quality of his comment threads. DPF allows trolls like D4J and Redbaiter to voice offensive prejudice generally with impunity - knowing their outrages are lightning rods that will attract a backlash of responses. It’s an effective means of driving traffic - but it’s not really quality, is it?

What’s more, DPF and some of his leading supporters delight in describing the likes of rogernome, sam dixon, tane and sonic as being trolls. Yet, these contributors tend only to make intelligent comments (or the infrequent jibe back when provoked) but they’re trolls because their commentary is not in line with the National Party/conservative line. And, as Robyn intelligently deconstructed in her essay, Kiwiblog is not really a safe place for intellectual exchange.

Star-crossed lovers

People have noticed Red’s recent absence from DPF’s Great Hall of Ignorance. Perhaps the threat of moderation might have got to him - or, maybe, he just can’t be arsed tonight. Lord knows - judging from tonight’s lazy-arse contributions from Farrar, it looks like he couldn’t be much arsed either. Still, I’d be waiting a few days before sending out the search parties. Red loves the attention - he’ll be back (or find another outlet for his wilful stupidity).

Still, Red’s no-show is already causing heart-felt pain. Red’s ideological fuck-buddy, D4J, is already pining. Check out his angst-ridden post from earlier this evening:

“Where is my mate redbaiter ? If he doesn’t come back then I’m off .”

There’s genuine pathos in that post and, not wishing to sound heartless, but as the kids might say: LMFAO!

Let’s play spot the D4J sockpuppet

You know, I have to admit I’ve got a secret yearning to actually meet Peter Burns. His online personae are just so completely out there…my brain seems incapable of accepting that these posts actually reflect the mind of someone who is (mostly) out in about in public.

One of the funny recurring themes in recent threads has been rogernome and pascal relentlessly calling out D4J’s hopeless attempts at sockpuppetry. The problem for D4J is he’s just so painfully bad at it. It’s almost too embarrassing. D4J’s attempts at sockpuppetry are hampered by the fact that he is too dim to hide either his unique posting style or too egotistical to keep his puppets from raving about him. The result is that his clones stick out like the proverbial dog bollocks.

Burns’ denials sort of remind me of when five year olds lie to you about something you know they did.

“Did you eat the cake, Peter?”

“No, a big green bird flew in the window and stole some cake”.

“But Peter, you’ve got cake around your mouth”.

“Ummmmm…the bird’s name is Henry”.

D4J’s most obvious alter-ego is “john”. This is a little taster of some classic D4J-esque rant from “john”:

Andrew W has a point DF, what if i say( i dont approve of the lesbian mayor and mayoress of kapiti) and your moderator gays, flag me as a redneck(hint)is that free speech being stifled by a minority group,and are there, middle of the road married middleclass hetrosexual white trade persons on the moderator board.I WONDER?????you know the sort .working New Zealanders paying taxes .

Another sign D4J is not particularly good at sockpuppetry is that he’s neglected to have his personae get angry about being ridiculed as being sockpuppets - strike that: Being ridiculed for being the sockpuppets of a demented idiot. Yet despite Roger and Pascal’s incessant teasing, the only person who get’s riled up is D4J. I mean, if I were “john” I would be furious I was being written off as a crazy man’s sockpuppet. But do the puppets get angry? Nope.

Occam’s razor: These other profiles have got to be D4J because accepting that is easier than believing there is more than one of these crazy, bitter bastards running around the countryside.

So, who other than john is your favourite D4J creation?

Mass Debate

Sorry for the header: It’s puerile - but someone had to make the crack!

DPF has announced he’s going to open up a daily general debate topic to allow people to unburden themselves on a range of topics. This should be good. I see the more motivated and intelligent posters like Sonic, Tane Sam and Rogernome seizing the opportunity to vent while the ever reliable dullards like Inventory2, Bok and burt will flail about with their usual ineffectual and vaguely abusive thumpings.

To be honest, I think DPF’s not thought this through. As Ralston noted recently, the Left tend to out argue and generally outperform the Right in these electronic fora. DPF may be thinking about trying to rein in his threads in the lead up to the Election but a General Debate loosens the strictures to potentially allow National to get a hammering. I wonder if he cleared this with HQ?

Can you imagine what D4J is going to do in an unfettered environment?! Oh mother!

Kiwiblog: Digital Talkback

A question:  What differentiates Kiwiblog from talkback radio?

I am not sure there is a difference - and I think DPF might actually want it that way.

All this talk about moderation is a red herring.  DPF gets a lot of foot traffic from some of the more bizarre outliers of political thought in New Zealand.  As crazy as the people are, they’re great for DPF’s traffic stats.  Let’s face it, Redbaiter and D4J just by themselves generate an inordinate amount of responses.

DPF, like talkback, floats broad and relatively colourless articles aimed at provoking debate down avenues he and his party masters want to push debate.  He can then rely on the assorted nuts to generate the noise he needs for traffic and attention.

D4J stalks John Key

Dad4Justice is off is lead and has left the compound. No longer content to be fed his daily bone by Mr Farrar, he’s now taking it to the man himself - via his website at least.

Shall I take it you won’t publish my comments. I must let everybody know ?
Kind regards
Peter Burns

PETER: All constructive comments are welcome. Your last attempted post was not constructive. You are most welcome to spread the word.

Politicians always attract their fair share of unwanted attention but I wonder when David will let John know where D4J learned his trade? What word should D4J spread for crissakes?

D4J brings out the funnies

Virtually everyone finds D4J’s rants to be offensively awful. But geez, they do seem to bring out the comedian in some of the other posters. I reckon this is because there’s only so many times you can express outrage about the inane offensive crap spewing out of D4J’s damaged persona before it gets boring - so some have resorted to amusing themselves and others with their responses to D4J’s stupidity.

I thought today’s gem came from pascal with this:

You know D4J, there is a saying about a thousand monkeys, a thousand typewriters and pure blind chance. You’re all on your own with your monkeys. Now how long will it take you to tap out something intelligent?

In fact this one thread contained some other great comments like rikcyjj’s response to D4J’s revelation that his daughter had been “sculling piss since 12″:

Haha man there’s so many great comebacks to that, but yeah I know, I shouldn’t go there.

Of course, nih has been razzing D4J relentlessly. But we loved this cutting response:

You love me. Go on, admit it.

Any other great comebacks?